TFDL: Prelude Thoughts

I just realized that I never wrote a chapter dedicated to the end of TFDL: Prelude. I never really shared my thoughts and feelings after finishing the first book. I think I had already started the document for book two, so there didn't seem to be a pause in writing. This piece originally was going to be a work that I kept to myself. I wasn't brave enough to share it online until a friend had encouraged me to do so. Funnily, TFDL: Prelude was the first story that I had released, but it wasn't the first that I had written. I actually had a romance-tragedy...

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Review # 18: Can you stay one more hour? by MoonlightDrive

This is definitely a stronger work compared to your other story. The writing voice is certainly there, but you're still having trouble punctuating your dialogues. You're switching tenses often as well. Ellipses come in sets of threes, not twos. The phrase, "it's the pain isn't going to go" sounds awkward. This story oddly reminds me of Leonardo DiCaprio's situation in Inception. My goodness! I really feel that it is like Leonardo DiCaprio's failed relationship in that film. Did you by any chance watch that film? I'm just wondering. Hehehe. I...

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Status Update 5 - Early February

I can't believe it's almost February! I think I need to be patient sometimes and release my stories according to my schedule, and not by my mood. You see, the problem is that once I receive comments, I become really excited and so I release a chapter before my perceived date. So, here's the deal . . . for myself. I will religiously follow this schedule. There will not be any spontaneous releases! Here are the dates then! Side note: Another thing stopping me from updating is my health. I'm suffering from a painful cold that makes me want to...

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Review # 17: You're my Destiny (SHINee Fanfic) by CandyLove18

I always skim through the first page, and here are my initial observations. You need to learn how to punctuate your dialogues properly. For the dialogue tags, I would suggest varying your vocabulary. It would be more interesting to see the character's actions as opposed to seeing something like, "she said" or "he asked". I think you can try to describe the settings in more detail. Sometimes, I feel that you're in a hurry to get to the next scene. I know you're excited about writing, but do remember to slow down and add more to your writing. Here,...

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Review # 16: LS Chapter One: The Hunt by Peach Kiss

Here I go again with my typical reviewing style.  At first glance, I notice that it seems like you are using two to three different fonts. I'm not sure if it's the copying and pasting onto blogspot that destroys your old font or if you're doing this on purpose. The point is that it bothers the readers' eyes. I'm distracted by this small difference in font styles and it's not good when I'm unfocused! Since, your writing can be copy and pasted onto blogspot, it makes my life easier. I don't have to type your sentences onto this post to quote...

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Review # 15: She is Mine by SeanPowell

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Review # 14: 'Till Death Do Us Part . . . a Mafia Love Story by ReeseyBoo

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Review # 13: The Runaway's by Bebhinn

Behold, the blinding of the eyes. Yes, I may be exaggerating here with my wonderful hyperbole, but please, I urge you, do not bold entire paragraphs. Do not even think about bolding important words. Just simply bold your title. Technically, even bolding your title is not right.  Place commas when needed.  What does this mean, “I had back and hung my head low”? I’ve read that sentence three times and I am still confused. When you have a flashback, it is very unnecessary to add “Flashback”. You should be able to write so that people know...

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Review # 12: Mind Games (A Vampire Story) by mt_foster

I don't think it's necessary to tell ask your readers to stay in your author's note and explain that it's a flashback. Like I said to another writer before, if you think it's boring, then fix it. Fix it so that others will stay. Don't sound desperate. (Follow rule 16.) By the way, there is a function on wattpad that lets you put different copyrights, depending on which one you like, so instead of writing "copyright by ___", you could just use that and there will be some copyright print at the bottom of each page. Please follow rule one: homonyms...

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Review # 11: Just One Touch by RobynTodd

I don't mean to be rude, but don't have grammatical errors in your author's note. That's like foreshadowing future mistakes. Don't do POVS. (Follow rule eight.) Don't spontaneously space out your paragraphs like that. You just need to hit enter once. Even if you want to signal a break in time, just use a divider or if you don't know how, just enter once and then do this: ------ You're shifting your tenses. (Refer to rule nine.) Punctuate your dialogues properly. You need a comma after saying someone's name to signal a natural pause. (See...

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Review # 10: Salvation by Kat201

I see someone not obeying rule 1: homonyms are homonyms. I'll take it as a typo for now. You put "it's" instead of "its". Okay, I take that back. Maybe, You have a problem with that rule. I believe you mean "veins" not "vanes". I also think you mean "their" not "they're". There is a difference between "then" and "than". Punctuate your dialogues and sentences correctly. You need commas to act as natural pauses. "We're not going to end up in debt Joan! I know what I'm doing! For crying out loud will you trust me for once!" should be "[we're] not...

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Review # 9: (Forsaken) Vampires will never hurt you by HeidiVale

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