Prologue
Time and distance typically had
the effect of severing relationships, but bonds could be stronger due to such
obstacles. It all depended on the people involved in such relationships. Did
they want to exert more effort to maintain liaisons? Was it necessary to keep
in touch? Sometimes, all it took was one look, one phone call or one email to
rekindle relationships. Perhaps, it would be more appropriate to say that separations
were inevitable, but good-byes were not because there was a chance of saying
hello again. It just depended on whether or not people wanted to take that
initiative.
Chapter 1: The Hidden
Devil Questions the Nerdy Girl and the Leader Remembers
A pleasant surprise was what Changmin
would have described the start of his New Years. It was a pleasant surprise to
open the door to find a familiar face in this foreign town. It was a pleasant
surprise to find her at his doorstep.
“Shiori,” he now harked. “What
are you doing here?”
She gently stomped her boots on
the place mat, keeping her head down and her hair drooping across her face. Changmin
noticed that there were sprinkles of snow scattered along her long hair, her
black polka-dotted scarf, and on the shoulders of her beige trench coat. She
had been walking for a while and that . . . that made his chest shrivel a tad.
“Is it all right for me t-to come
in?” Shiori stammered in an overly anxious, yet overly proverbial manner.
“Yeah, hurry in.”
Changmin helped brush off the
snow on her shoulders and tugged her forward. As she slipped off her boots, he
dropped a pair of slippers in front of her feet and then walked past the raised
wooden platform to the kitchen to pour both of them some water. He now took a
seat at the end of the rectangular cedar table.
“So, why are you here?” Changmin
asked.
Making her way to the seat across
from Changmin, Shiori simply answered, “It seemed like the only place for
comfort.”
“You must be shitting me.” He even started to
scoff, “Comfort? You expect me to comfort you?”
“No,” she placed her jacket over
the chair before sitting down to answer, “I-I just . . . never expected you to
ask anything. I just . . . expected silence. That . . . to me is comfort.”
She had come to the right place
then, if she were seeking silence. This town was too silent, so silent that Changmin
felt that after living here for a few weeks, he was already starting to converse
with himself. He could not deny, however, how peaceful it was at times to purely
watch the snow fall while sipping on a warm cup of black coffee.
He passed her the other mug and
pointed to his left, “There’s a guest room at the end of the hall. You can put
your things there.”
“Thank you, Mr. Mizushima,” she
took a gulp of the warm water.
“Sure, sure.”
He rolled his eyes while leaning
backwards in his chair. As she scurried to the room, he reared his head,
staring at the ceiling and wondering what he had just done.
“Since when did you get so soft
hearted, Changmin?” he quietly asked himself.
He shook his head before washing
their mugs. He was becoming silly here, he kept brainwashing himself. This was
utter silliness. Her coming here was . . .
She suddenly appeared from behind
him and attempted to snatch the cups from him. Shiori had felt rather guilty
for coercing Changmin to accept her arrival. Truthfully, she had expected him
to reject her. She had already researched the location of a local, run-down
motel, just in case the likely result was to occur. She was too amazed by his
willingness and now too grateful of his unexpected kindness.
“Here, sensei,” she uttered. “Let
me wash those.”
Her hands had unintentionally
grabbed onto his, causing Changmin to stammer, “I-it’s fine.”
“No, it’s not.”
“I told you it’s—“
She reached for his hands again
in hopes of stealing the mugs from him. She had tugged with so much force on
the opposite end that the mugs were thrown in the air. Realizing what was about
to occur, Changmin leapt to follow the flying cups. Amazingly, he succeeded but
in the process, he had tackled Shiori and landed on top of her with a cup in
each hand.
“Oh thank god,” he breathed a
sigh of relief.
“S-s-s-s-sensei,” her voice was
so muffled that Changmin’s chin fell to his chest. Shiori was right underneath
him, suffocating from Changmin’s abdomen.
Before he could react, however,
the door had opened and an old lady along with a little girl entered, “I’m so
sorry to disturb you, Mizushima sensei, but it seems that—“
“Grandma! What are those two
doing?”
Changmin’s jaw fell open once he
recognized that it was little Shiori and her Grandma. The position that Shiori
and he were in was nothing, but suggestive, maybe even notorious.
“No, it’s not what you think,” Changmin
urgently blurted.
Little Shiori persisted to
question while tugging on her grandma’s sleeve, “Grandma, tell me what’s going
on! I want to know!”
“Shiori, don’t look,” she placed
her palm over the innocent girl. “It’s rude to watch.”
“No, no, this is a misunder—“
“We’ll come back another time, Mizushima
sensei,” the Grandma, whose cheeks were carrot red, bowed and dragged her
granddaughter away. “Good evening to you and your wife.”
Once the door slammed, so did Changmin’s
patience. He stood up, placed the objects onto the counter, and grimaced. Shiori
was still lying on the ground, in too much pain to stand up.
“I’m . . . sorry,” she too
sported a red face. “I-I just thought . . .”
Scratching the back of his head
hastily, he sighed, “Don’t sweat it. It wasn’t your fault anyways.”
“I-I-I’ll explain to them
everything.”
She tried her best to lift her
body from the ground, but winced in the course. Changmin exhaled rather loudly
and hauled her hand forward, forcing her to stand straight.
“T-thanks,” she bit her lip.
“You have bad bones,” Changmin
grumbled and then marched off to his room. He returned with an ointment for
bruises and tossed it at her. “Rub that on where it hurts,” he instructed. “I’m
going to sleep now, so if you need anything, just look around or wait till the
morning to ask me.”
Stretching out his arms, he
proceeded to his bedroom. He really needed to rest. Today was too dramatic and
he wasn’t used to dealing with drama. What guy would endure drama? He rolled
his eyes, shaking his head. Better not think too much or else my brain cells
are going to die at this rate, he thought.
“Thanks,” Shiori called from
behind. “Thanks for letting me stay.”
Her coming here . . . might not
have been a mistake, well, a perpetual mistake.
------
The New Years was when Rhett
returned home to celebrate with his family. His Christmas might have been
accompanied with friends or now, Hana, but he vowed that New Years would always
be time left for his family. Who knew though that traffic would be so heavy? He
had to blame work for delaying him. He had worked overtime again despite how
adamantly he had sworn that this time, he would be on time. He had phoned though on his way and judging
from his mother’s tone, they were disappointed in him.
“You should have called earlier,
Yunho,” she sighed. “Your father was so happy this time.”
“Sorry, umma.” He gripped onto
his steering wheel tighter, answering, “There was work.”
“Even your father has let go of
work these days,” she mumbled.
His father had been a workaholic,
but now that he had retired a few years ago, he had more time to himself and to
the family. At the start of his retirement, however, he could not rest. He
wanted to work and visited the office often to scan the department store.
Worrying that Rhett would have difficulty handling the amount of work now that
he had retired, he used to question Rhett about the daily operations. Rhett would
constantly reassure him that everything was fine even though he had retired. It
was an enduring, yet valuable lesson that was bound to repeat itself one day.
Even if an employee were to leave, no matter how high or low of a status that
person held, the company would survive. A new batch of workers would replenish
the old. A new era would commence, and people would forget about those in the
past for they only cared about the present or the future. Would he be engulfed
in this tide one day? Was he becoming like his father with a tarnished, old
soul?
There was a loud honk that
blasted from behind him, awakening him from his thoughts. Rhett sighed while
stepping on the brakes. He had almost caused a crash accident if the car behind
him had not warned him of the changing light.
“Fuck,” he cursed.
“Honey? I heard something loud,”
his mother anxiously uttered. “Is everything all right?”
“Yes, I’m fine,” he responded.
“I’ll call you once I’m close to home. I need to focus on my driving right
now.”
“All right. Be safe, okay?”
“I know, I know,” he murmured.
He pressed a button on his
steering wheel to end the conversation. Then, he switched the radio on, hoping
to hear a song that would ease his mind. All the songs being played were hyper,
lively ones to welcome the start of a new year. They were the sort that people
enjoyed dancing to at a club. He found himself pressing the tuning button over
and over again for the perfect song. His song couldn’t be too fast nor could it
be too slow. It had to have a tad of sadness, yet it could not be to the extent
of a heart break. He didn’t want a distraction of lyrics, but rather of a
simple melody.
He first heard the strumming of
an acoustic guitar and the gliding of a violin, and then a woman’s enchanting
voice followed by the continuous beats of an electric drum. He had no idea what
she was singing. Was it English? Was it French? Was it even a language? Nevertheless,
he listened to the whole song and he suddenly thought of her. There was no
reason to think of her, but for some reason, he felt the need to share with her
his finding.
Reaching his phone, he quickly
texted in between the long waits: “Happy New Year. I almost forgot about it.”
Then, a minute later, he sent another one: “I think I found a good song for the
New Year.”
He hadn’t expected her to text
back. In fact, they hadn’t been texting for a while now. She wrote, “Oh, what
is it?”
He laughed, typing, “I don’t know
what it’s called.”
“Find it then,” she had answered
along with an emoticon expressing her frustration with his attitude.
“I don’t even understand the
language,” he typed back.
“Hum it on this program online.”
“No computer right now, and it’s
okay,” he added. “It’s one of those songs that you hear once and it’s enough.”
Even through a text message,
Rhett knew that she was making some face at him. He could practically hear her
voice reprimanding him. Instead, he received this: “You let go of things too
easily.”
He had to read the message twice.
It wasn’t what he had expected. He felt his heart pound with a bit more force,
nervous about what she had to say. He blinked hard once and then stared at the
screen again before responding, “Like what?”
“I was just saying that in a general sense.
Sheesh,” she remarked, to which he chuckled. “Anyhow, even if you don’t find
the song, it might come to you one day. Like one time, I tried so hard to find
this song, but didn’t until a year later. Out of the blue, I found it.”
“So, you’re saying I should let
it go?”
She corrected, “You should try at
least to find it. If you can’t, then let it go and let everything fall
naturally.”
“Where have you been then?”
He didn’t know why he had typed
that. Once he had hit the sent button, he already regretted asking the
question. He received no response from her. As expected, she was indeterminable
like that song. Too far away now, he thought. He reread what she had written.
You should try at least to find it. If you can’t, then let it go and
let everything fall naturally.
Did he even try to find her? Did
a few text messages count as finding someone?
“I’m home,” he finally announced
as he rang the door bell.
“Oppa!” Julie, who wore a Happy
New Year head band, jumped up to embrace her own brother. Dragging him along,
she urged, “It’s about time you’re here! We’re just about to count down to the
New Year! Oh, but first, there’s a package for you!”
“A package for me?” he stared at
her.
“Yeah, it’s from your lover,” Julie
giggled. “W-what?”
Julie rolled her eyes after
seeing his glare. Then, she dumped a yellow, standard-sized envelope into his
hands.
“Open it,” Julie chirped and
tugged at his sleeve.
“No, I’m opening it by myself,”
he grumbled.
Then, he walked upstairs to his
room to drop his belongings. After he changed into a set of comfortable
clothes, he held onto the package to see who had sent it to him. It was from Kannei.
There was a sheet of lined paper
folded in the shape of a card with nothing on the cover, except for the word
Merry Christmas. When he flipped inside, she wrote, “Yes, I decided to save my
money on this. I also had finals before this by the way. I do hope that you
have a Merry Christmas and that my plan worked. I am rather smart, so it should
work. Right? Ahaha. Just kidding. Best of luck to you, Kannei.”
His hand quivered as it reached
into the envelope for the other gift. It was a small notebook or rather, it was
an agenda with Hello Kitty’s trademark. He chuckled at the fact that it wasn’t
even wrapped. So Kannei, he thought. He opened the first page and read the note
that she left.
You’re always forgetting things. I thought it was time you started to
write things down. Plus, with a Hello Kitty cover, you’re bound to remember to
bring this around.
--Kannei
He tried imagining carrying
around a Hello Kitty agenda to the office or even showing it in public. Now,
another label would be pasted on him: girly. Yuck.
Julie hopped onto his bed,
reached for the little agenda, and pondered, “What’s that? Wow! It’s so cute!
Oppa, where did you find this? This is a limited edition Hello Kitty 10th
anniversary agenda!”
“It is?”
Julie frowned, rambling, “Yeah!
You’re such a dimwit! Anyhow, you probably wouldn’t need this, so why don’t you
give it to me? Okay?” Before he could even answer, she announced, “Okay, deal!
I’m taking—“
“Hey! That’s mine!”
He chased after her and ripped it
away from her hands. She stuck her tongue out and rolled her eyes.
“Meanie! Always hogging things!
Wait till I tell Jaejoong oppa and Changmin oppa about this! They’ll laugh
their heads off!”
“Oh you wouldn’t dare!” Rhett
countered. “I’ll tell Jaejoong that you like him! Oh and also how ‘hot’ and
‘sexy’ you think he is.”
Julie’s face turned apple red
while storming off downstairs, “Oppa! You’re such a nincompoop! I still don’t
get how Kannei can stand you.”
Was that why Kannei hadn’t
returned his replies? She couldn’t bear him anymore? If she couldn’t tolerate
him, then why did she reply just a few hours ago? He felt his cell phone
vibrate in his pocket and then he saw what she had written this time.
I forgot to say Happy New Year and . . . I’ve been doing some thinking
lately. I just think . . . it’s better if we don’t remain in contact anymore. I
thought . . . since it’s the New Year, it would be a good time to say good-bye,
and well, welcome the New Year. Thank you.
He carelessly tossed his cell
phone, letting all of the pieces and gadgets shatter onto the ground naturally.
Facing what was left of his destruction, he bent down now to retrieve the bits
of what remained of his cell phone. He heard the cheers of his family, “Happy
New Year! Whoot!”
He clenched a fist and then pounded it onto the ground.
Good-bye? Thank you? He didn’t understand her anymore and then he thought he
heard the chords of that song again. He recalled how incomprehensible the
songstress was. He had enjoyed the melody, but now he wished that he could
grasp what she was saying. Because then . . . he could find it, no, her again.
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